Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Time to Make the Funeral Arrangements

Fred the Baker from the Dunkin' Donuts commercials passed away. He lived to 83, so maybe doughnuts aren't so bad for you after all. He retired from the commercials some time ago, before almost every D & D was fitted with a Baskin Robbins and Togo sandwich shop. His famous line would be "Time to make the donuts, and the sundaes, and the Philly cheesesteaks" nowadays, which isn't as catchy. He seemed like a friendly guy in the ads, though he sort of resembled a portly Hitler. Shit, I guess if Adolf Hitler was a little heavier, he could've made a lot of money in the breakfast biz.

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Throw Out Your Trees!

Well Christmas has finally passed, and I'm glad. We've been looking at decorations and crap since September and now we can go back to living our lives. You know, those other 8 months of the year where it isn't Christmas and we can celebrate other holidays without Santa and Co. being in the rear-view mirror. In a few days it will be New Year's Eve, the greatest excuse to drink because, well, "2006 is gonna kick ass." It probably won't, and everything will be a huge disappointment, but hey, we can drink the year's problems away next NYE. And I'm glad to say I won't be going to one of these overpriced, overcrowded, underbartended places in the city that charges $125 a head for a few hours of open bar. There's little chance I would spend $125 on drinks just for myself in one night and within the time alotted, and it's hard enough to get one when there are like 2 bartenders for the entire joint, so it's definitely a lose/lose situation.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

If You See Something, Say Something Vulgar

I see 34,000 people who better get back to work. Any little sympathy for them is vanishing quickly and they should all be ashamed of themselves for disrupting so many commuters. Teachers and cops were without contracts at times, but they did the noble thing and didn't walk. The TWU has shown they have zero class and don't deserve a penny in raises. I think it goes without saying that I hope Roger Toussaint and his VP's go to prison and get ass raped for Christmas.

Monday, December 19, 2005

Time to Dust Off the Bike

Ya know, this transit strike coincides perfectly with the discounted fares from the MTA, which means we won't really benefit from anything if the trains aren't running. On the other hand, the discounted fares are probably what will cause the strike.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Stand Clear of the Closing Doors

I didn't think of this at first (probably because I'll have my own problems), but if the Transit Workers Union goes on strike at midnight, a lot of homeless people are not going to make any money tomorrow. In fact, they may start there own underground hobo society in the stations if it lasts long enough. Trippy.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Spreading Holiday Cheer Wherever I Go

I went Christmas shopping Saturday (yes, Christmas shopping, not holiday or seasonal shopping) and found myself getting mad at people I have to get gifts for because they don't have any interests. They just work and stay home and that's it. I can't buy any stupid golf accessories or cool gadgets, and I'm too proud to buy them a basket of cheese. A giftcard would likely be used to buy me sweaters next year, so that would backfire (I'm taking a stand on sweaters this year, and any received will result in me immediately asking for a gift receipt). Boring clothes they shall receive. It's the only way. And when the hell did Furbys come back??

Monday, December 05, 2005

Dictator Tots

If Saddam isn't afraid to die, why not just shoot him? This trial is just wasting everyone's time. His lawyers want delays so they can put off their next delay and does anyone else think the courtroom looks like a bunch of baby cribs? The Iraqis must love this democracy thing.