Please Don't Be Like Mike

The start of Michael Jackson's trial has been delayed til 2005. This is so the defense has more time to work on their case, and so Jacko can artificially impregnate more women before the trial. I mean, he's gonna need to play with more than quadruplets (and if he has one more kid named Prince Michael...). The real problem is that all these kids he molests aren't his. If they're his own kids and they sleep in his bed he's got the excuse that they had a nightmare every night for 12 years. Farfetched, yes, but a little less creepy. Or maybe not.