Monday, June 20, 2005


So Saddam hates Froot Loops? That bastard. You know, you can gas your own people, you can invade neighboring countries, but you DO NOT hate on Tucan Sam. Not cool, Saddam, not cool.

Monday, June 13, 2005

Wacko on the Loose

Today was the most shocking day in recent memory. A celebrity gets acquitted and another celebrity announces she'll be a Scientologist because her celebrity boyfriend is one. Truly a unique day in Hollywood.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Sign of the Apocolypse #5691

I just had a birthday recently and didn't receive any wrapped presents. Yes, I got presents, but all in the form of unwrapped items placed in giftbags. Damn it, I wanted to unwrap stuff. Giftbags are only for unwrappable items like unboxed shoes or a Limited Edition Yoda Mini Bust. You don't put clothes in a gift bag; you get a box, fold them inside, and wrap the box. There's your cause for obesity right there. We're too lazy to wrap presents anymore, so why bother to exercise and eat tofu? Just for the record, the invention of tofu was sign of the apocolypse #3215.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Senile Old Coot Thinks He's Deep Throat!

Tell me that's a bad headline.