Review of Star Wars: Episode III Revenge of the Long Titles

NOT ENOUGH WOOKIEES!

24: Between 4 AM and 5 AM

Do you really have to do a guy in the ass to use his cell phone? If it's after 9 I really wouldn't care. It was probably during peak hours.

A Post Not About 24

As he stated on the witness stand, Macaulay Culkin was not molested by Michael Jackson. What does this mean exactly? Is Macaulay Culkin the gold standard of child molestors? Surely if Jacko could resist him, there's no way he'd settle for any other boy. Ground chuck over filet mignon? No siree, Bob. Someone should just swing a paint can tied to a rope at MJ's lawyers.

24: Between 2 AM and 3 AM

Whoa, Jack, don't think you impressed your girlfriend by letting her husband die like that. Don't count on getting any at 7:01 AM. And now that Palmer isn't really president anymore but has the authority, he's suddenly Mr. Ballsy. Hey, if it ain't your money, right?